After a long time of sweat, tears, and procrastination, my first content pack is finally finished!* *finished, as in 'finished enough to be presentable.'
congratulations! you, [recipient name here], are now a proud customer of EnginoCorp tech and munitions, Inc. In particular, you have received authorization for use of EnginoCorp's non-experimental-and-totally-realistic weapons. The weapons are as follows:
1. 8 shot revolver 'Kowboi'
2. subsonic machine weapon 'SubMachinima'
3. long range aiming rifle 'Snipe'
4. 2 shot pump action shotgun 'Wyrm'
Each of these fine weapon all utilize EnginoCorp's new A.G.U.S.A. system.
"What is A.G.U.S.A.?" you may ask. well, [recipient name here], the A.G.U.S.A. system is the new in for weapons and munition technologies alike. A.G.U.S.A. stands for:
Clever, right? in conjunction, you are also permitted to build and use the new EnginoCorp Munitions Box, along with the patent-pending Funds credit system. All you have to do is this:
1. activate the EnginoCorp Munitions Box
2. insert Funds
3. select weapon
Yes, with the EnginoCorp Munitions Box [EMB], you instantaneously gain your new weapon in a blink of an eye!**. but, did you know that if you find yourself in a pickle,*** you can use your Funds and instantly spawn Bullits?**** yes, it's a feature we left in during development because who would want to be stuck in a sticky situation?***** surly not you, [recipient name here].
Therefore, and in conclusion, enjoy your newfound technology, and to all those unrelenting A-holes you encounter, take an EnginoCorp weapon and "blow 'em a new one!"******
Fred Engino, CEO EnginoCorp
**assuming you have eyes and have not shot them out by accident/deliberately.
***pickle not included.
****not a typo.
*****we are not held responsible if actually in sticky situation.